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Cya…

Adios.

 

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Jason Turbow’s A’s (e-)book is on for $2.99

Turbow’s Baseball Codes blog is amazing (we quote it here often).

Guy can write.

Todau his book about the championship A’s teams of the early 70s is on Amazon.com and .ca for $2.99 for the electronic edition.

Dynastic, Bombastic, Fantastic: Reggie, Rollie, Catfish, and Charlie Finley’s Swingin’ A’s

 

OK, This Anthem Stuff

So last night some asshole on the A’s knelt during the anthem. Various points:

  1. I’m not even sure why we still play the anthem before games between clubs. It gained in prominence during the 1918 World Series: http://www.espn.com/espn/story/_/id/6957582/the-history-national-anthem-sports-espn-magazine and I guess it never went away. Over in Europe they’ve basically replaced it with league-specific songs, which crowds don’t specifically rise for. Maybe the NFL could buy the rights to Hank Jr.’s “All My Rowdy Friends”.
  2. It sucks, but Donald Trump is kinda right: why are these guys trying to draw attention to themselves at the expense of a national tradition?
  3. One way Trump is dead wrong is that people aren’t going to stop watching the games. Ray Rice KTFO his girlfriend in an elevator, and dragged her out by her legs. That’s rather worse than making an ass out of yourself during the anthem. Nobody stopped watching. Roethlisberger, Elliott, etc. Nobody stopped watching.
  4. These guys who won the biological lottery, earning millions a year playing sports trying to pretend they’re all about ‘social justice’ make me giggle. Give away 80-90% of your salary to charity, then we’ll talk. They’re just attention whores.
  5. I really don’t give a shit about people’s politics when I want to watch them play sports. If Jim Bunning wants to go into politics after baseball, or if players want to tweet when they’re not on the field on Wednesday morning, I don’t give a shit. Fine. I don’t have to vote for Bunning or read tweets. Come game time, I want to be entertained.
  6. Oh, one other thing: Trump made this a big deal not because he cares about it but because he’s getting punk’d (again) by Congress over a healthcare bill (again) and getting embarrassed by L’il Kim in North Korea (again). Anything to change the subject.

Best Blog Article Ever

My favourite, from June 1, 2015: Saget’s stream of consciousness about watching the Marlins when they were relevant. (Did you know that Mike/Giancarlo Stanton has never played on a team with a winning record?) Anyway, it’s worth another read. (I was having a shitty day, and I’ve left my original preamble to the piece out here). Saget writes:

I was channel surfing last night and Pujols was at bat against Price….I had not seen Pujols on TV in awhile and I was wondering why he looked different….ROIDS! I wouldn’t bet my nuts on it, but something was definitely going on (HGH, andro?) since I last saw Pujols on TV on a consistent basis This leads me into “Marlin Memories”:

Between 1999-2003 I went to dental school in Davie, FL (Greater Ft Lauderdale-same town The Rock is from…saw his dad all the time). ProPlayer/Joe Robbie-whatever the fuck you want to call it [Post ’98: ‘No Player’ Stadium?–Ed] was a straight shot down University Drive right across the Broward/Dade Co line. 10 minutes.

The then ProPlayer stadium sat over 70,000 fans for the Dolphins and consistently drew only 7,000-10,000 fans during the week. When 7,000 fans were in the 70000+ seat stadium it felt like a cavern. Weird. It was quiet too, so I would actually study in the stands until 2003 rolled along and they went on their run after the Conine trade.

—–

There was a section called the “Fish Tank” and the tickets were $2….yes, TWO freaking dollars…I paid $10 for parking. After a few innings in the Fish Tank at the top of the stadium behind home plate, I would move down to the 10th row along the 3rd base side where the visiting team always was….this was a perfect view of the pitcher and the visitors on-deck circle.

Albert Pujols up close looked like Conan the Barbarian, he was fucking huge, you could see the definition in his back through his jersey. He was a monster!

The Albert Pujols of 99-03 I saw annually looked nowhere near the guy I saw on TV last night and it wasn’t just old age. When you work out and eat right, you cut, defined, and lean like Brad Pitt in Fight Club or Floyd Mayweather. To look like the former California Governor, you lift hard, you lift often and eat protein like a mother fucker and juice up. [Ronald Fucking Reagan?–Ed.] Pro players don’t have that kind of time. He was on roids or HGH.

Other fuckers I saw up close and were just monstrous…..Sammy Sosa, Barry Bonds, Jeff Bagwell…..the problem was they were disproportionate, small bodies, big huge muscles, big heads. Not just their biceps, forearms…neck……Pujols at least looked somewhat natural.

—–

I graduated and missed the 2003 world series because i left Florida, but here’s the top 10 coolest shit I saw along the 3rd base line while I was attending Marlin games

10) AJ Burnett Fastballs up close….holy shit….LASER BEAMS!…scary

9)  Mike Piazza upper deck HR off Dempster: ProPlayer was not a conventional baseball stadium; an upper deck shot was very rare. Compare it to Canseco shot 7th deck of Skydome back in ’89. [Fix this Mendoza. Thx.–Ed.]

8)  Barry Bonds HRs during his 2001-73 HR roid inspired year

7)  Josh Beckett’s first game

6)  Miguel Cabrera’s first game….HR to straight CF

5) Witnessing Luis Castillo’s 35 game hit streak

4) Rookie Dontrelle Willis 1 Hit shutout, out dueling Randy Johnson

3) NL East teams played each other 19 times….I saw Marlins-Braves games until I puked. Maddux, Glavine, Smoltz…Great pitchers but they got ridiculous “respect” calls. Strikes called 3 inches off the plate…pure bullshit…..that’s why the Braves lost in the playoffs. They did not get as many calls because the Umps knew they were on National TV and Maddux and Glavine chucking it up there between 88-91 MPH wasn’t going to cut it if they didn’t get extra strikes, especially against great hitting teams.

I give credit where credit is due. Andruw Jones is a scum bag piece of shit [Fuck Off!–Ed.] but he is the greatest defensive CF of his generation [Andruw’s a friend, but that’s BS–Ed.], he was incredible and he made impossible plays look easy and Chipper Jones left=handed swing was a thing of beauty. By the way, he’s a piece of shit too [Our old leaguemate would agree–Ed.]

2) 2002 Yankees-Marlins series….more Yanks fans in the stands than Marlins….only sold out games I went to besides Opening Day. Marlins took 2 of 3 and chased an undefeated Clemens. Alex Gonzalez hit 2 HRs off Clemens, unbelievable….but I got to see the REAL Yankees up close, Mo Rivera, Jeter, Pettitte, Posada, Bernie Williams, Brosius.

1) Cal Ripken standing ovations his last ABs vs the Marlins, he stepped out of the box and tipped his helmet…..Marlins won, but Ripken hit 2 HRs off AJ Burnett. Fans went apeshit after the 2nd HR.

Side note….Mike Lowell and Kevin Millar were my favorite players….just clutch. [Go Sawx!–Ed.] Derrek Lee and Preston Wilson frustrating as hell to watch back then, but when they connected, they were gone

—–

Between 1999-2003 along the 3rd base line……

I never saw a bench clearing brawl….very disappointing.

—–

I am amazed no one has been killed by a foul ball. The foul balls that just miss the back screen lateral boundaries and line drive into the 1st or 3rd base line come laser quick, less than a second reaction time and they are dangerous projectiles

—–

Early 2000 Bobby Valentine METS…

WORST defensive team I ever saw! Man did they suck. Piazza was a bad, bad, bad catcher, as soon as Luis Castillo or Juan Pierre got on 1st, you knew it was a double. Easy steal on Piazza.

Conversely, watching Charles Johnson and then Ivan Rodriguez mow down runners was a thing of beauty).

And Mo Vaughn was a big meatball.

—–

I saw Al Leiter attempt a routine pick off throw to the runner on 1st base with a high leg kick. Andy Fox was on 3rd base, as soon as he saw Leiter motion towards 1st, he took off. He slid into home with ease as Mo Vaughn bounced a throw home.

Roberto Alomar was awesome, but he was on bald thread tires with the Mets in the end. I got to see a young Jose Reyes though, he was good.

 

Halos simultaneously screwed Bud Norris, Jesse Chavez.

Here’s the link:

http://beta.latimes.com/sports/angels/la-sp-angels-chavez-norris-20170919-story.html

TL;DR:

Bud Norris, on 57,  needs 60 relief apps for a $500K bonus.

Jesse Chavez needed another start to reach a $250K bonus.

The Halos needed a bullpen game on Friday and Chavez is in the ‘pen.

So they started… Bud Norris.

GM says oh gee, that’s coincidence.

Uh huh.

Somewhere, the ghost of Knuckles Cicotte weeps.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eddie_Cicotte

 

 

How the Fuck did THAT happen?

Saget picked up 16 guys last week… 16…

 

and still didn’t make his innings?

GCBL Stanislav Petrov Memorial Week

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The man himself (2015 file photo), the King of Close Calls. It was announced Sunday that Petrov died aged 77. He might have saved your life. Stud. RIP.

You want close? It doesn’t get closer in Fantasy than Sunday’s semifinals, where Mendoza needed something from Brad Hand and I needed something from Michael A Taylor to sneak into the finals.

Mendoza got the save he needed from Hand at about 8:30 at night to tie Crow 6-6 and squeak into the final.

Piece of shit Taylor, who hasn’t done 5/8-of-fuck-all since the all-star break, did NOT give me the dinger required in the late game. Thus, I did not peg Assclowns back to 7-7. No final for me. Taylor’s oh-so-empty 0-for-4 capped off a disappointing week and a 7-6 loss for the Littleleague, condemning us to the third place game. “We’ll likely lose that too,” Taylor didn’t say. “I have absolutely no heart and should be in fucking Syracuse,” he didn’t add.

Well played by Assclowns.

And so four teams were separated by the slimmest of margins.

And what of Hand and Taylor? Were they clever draft picks destined to be stashed to come through in mid-September? Not exactly. We checked, and on Draft Day each was in minor league camp. Baseball is a funny game.

One man not easily impressed by weird situations was Lt. Col. Stanislav Petrov. Shift Commander at Soviet Missile Defence Forces on Sept. 26 1983, it was Petrov’s job to oversee the junior officers and technicians scouring the computer screens and satellite imagery. If that Reagan fellow attacked, Petrov was to dial up a counterstrike. And there it was, clear as day: five US ICBMs headed for Moscow. Tensions were already high, with the Soviets having blasted KAL 007 out of the sky three weeks prior. NATO was pursuing clandestine operations in Soviet waters…and the Soviets had caught them. Five nukes now incoming.

Petrov, though, unilaterally made the call not to rev up the machinery and hit the US back. Petrov reasoned that if the Americans were striking first, they’d be bringing more than five missiles from the 1200 estimated in the arsenal. He played his hunch and got it right: the computers were misfiring, mistakenly interpreting satellite data of sunlight on clouds as nuclear missiles.

Embarrassed at the system’s bugs, the Soviet military did what militaries sometimes do, burying Petrov in a less sensitive post where he wouldn’t be able to use common sense to save the world again. Petrov suffered a nervous breakdown, taking early retirement.

 

Mailbag: Hurricane Irma Edition

Hi CL,

Your friends in Curacao OK from the Huricane?

Just Wondering

Dear Wondering,

Everybody’s fine. Curacao is too far South to get even dribbles from most hurricanes. The last serious storm there was in 1913.

That said, the Dutch Islands in the N. Caribbean got it really bad. Don’t know about Statia. Saba is wrecked, but calm. Sint Maarten, if reports trickling into Curacao are to be believed, has turned into an extended scene from The Purge:

Gangs with machetes are roaming the streets. If your house wasn’t wrecked, they’re coming to loot, and you don’t want to be home as they’re not leaving witnesses behind.

The French sent in a couple companies of soldiers stationed in Guadeloupe. Don’t bring a machete to a gun fight–unless you’re fighting the French. They’re staying in barracks.

French and Dutch Special Forces (the northern half of the island is French; the southern half of the island is Dutch) are due in today or tomorrow to try to restore order.

Scary shit.

CL

Well, unless you’ve been living under a rock…

21button.jpeg (Just to be clear: I like the Graphic, but the Indians’ streak is legit.) 

Here it is, folks: having broken the AL record yesterday and tying the MLB record in the procress, the Cleveland Indians go for the longest winning streak in baseball history tonight against the Royals.

Wow.

So an open question: is (North) America living under a rock, or an NFL shield, or something else?

It’s a story, the Indians, but not of the scale I expect.

Why isn’t this the biggest sports story not of the day, but of the (non-Olympic) year? Why isn’t the general media breathlessly reporting every trip that Francisco Lindor takes to the bathroom?

A quick google-search reveals that more stories have been written this year about the Cleveland Indians’ controversial logo than about the streak.

A few possibilities:

  1. Baseball just isn’t as relevant as it used to be (as, say, in the days of the screengrab above)
  2. It’s a feel-good story, and the media hates feel-good stories if it can run a feel-bad story.
  3. Cleveland’s a small market, and what national interest there is re: Cleveland is focused on Lebron James
  4. NFL/Hurricane/DACA/Kim Jong-Un/Kim Kardashian/etc.

If I knew, I’d tell you. Opinions?

 

 

Open Letter to Copper

Copper,

I’m not going to litter the message board further because most people rightly don’t give a shit. And they shouldn’t have to. But I will put this here as my last statement on the matter, in response to your note. I don’t want the “Last Word”–feel free to take it in the Comments here, on the Message Board, or anywhere else.

You write in full:

Shawn, for someone who consistently referred to me as the “dirty commish” and frequently tried to make out I was spreading “fake news” your comments are ridiculous.

If you don want to play anymore fine but don’t make up reasons….

and here’s my answer:

  1. The ‘Dirty Commish’ stuff: This goes back 10 (15?) years to your football league and I think it was Bub who started it. (I’m not sure of the exact circumstances but I think English dropped Drew Brees and you reversed his drop?) I most certainly never started calling you that until you started referring to yourself that way jokingly (usually on the phone). “Well of course Josh/Dave/etc. didn’t like my trade, but I’m the ‘Dirty Commish’.” You called yourself that so much, I thought you took it not just as a joke, but as a harmless in-joke when I said it. I know now you didn’t take it as a harmless in-joke. I was wrong. I’m sorry.
  2. The best evidence I have that I don’t think and never thought you’re Dirty is that I’m eager to play in your basketball league.
  3. As to the ‘Fake News’ stuff, I thought that was more of the same. Again I was wrong and again I am sorry. You called me ‘Donald Trump’ more than a few times on chatbox, so I replied as Trump might: by calling your predictions/statements ‘Fake News’. I thought I was responding in-character. (Watch Trump’s press availabilities: that’s all he’s got.) Often, I even agreed 100% with your statements, and figured I could give them more ‘oomph’ by calling them Fake News. You didn’t see it that way, and I clearly didn’t notice. That’s on me, and I’m sorry.
  4. I’m not ‘making up reasons’ why I don’t want to play in your baseball league. It’s Just Dave. I told you that on the phone ten days ago and you seemed OK with that. Well at least you didn’t accuse me of making stuff up. If you think I’m making stuff up now, I assure you I’m not. Your claim that I’m making up reasons takes me by surprise, because you talked me out of quitting this league last year over the same issue.
  5. Dave is a bully. In time, with me not around, he’ll pick another target in your league. Maybe that target will have thicker skin than I do. But, eventually, it’ll get just as bad. A great deal of our misunderstanding is on me, as detailed above. For that, I’m sorry. Looking ahead, that doesn’t change that if you don’t get Dave to clean up his act (given how we know him in real life, this seems unlikely), you won’t be able to say you’re surprised when this happens again.

–S